mardi, novembre 18, 2008

Think Positive

You're short.

But this literally means that a smaller percentage of the population can see up your nose. And a large percentage of those who can regularly pick theirs, and some of them eat it.

That said, the technology exists for you to keep the nasal passages clean, and keep hair from protruding. In the absence of such technology, the act of forcibly removing nasal hair is a great way to manufacture tears, or stay awake on the night shift.

That said, working nights is a bitch, but what a great opportunity to keep the nasal passages clean without recrimination. I mean, you're short, so it isn't likely that anyone is going to be able to see up there anyway--and hey, why not congratulate yourself for being Zen about it? You're not one of those tall people who keep it clean just because so many people are forced by the inequities of Nature to look up there.

Which may not be the best motivation, but they should keep it clean anyway--for whatever reason they can find. Don't they realize that shorter individuals are granted a rather unfortunate perspective on the nasal cavities of others? Come on, people! If we, the short graveyard shifters of the world can keep it clean just because, they have all the more reason! They might take longer to achieve an enlightened perspective on the matter, but that's part of the misfortune of standing a head taller and looking down on people who, if there was such a thing as justice, would be able to look down on THEM, with their booger filled noses riddled with protruding hair, and say "Look in here! It is clean and the hair is carefully cropped, and not for your benefit, but simply because it IS."

Of course, if that were the case, I suppose the time currently spent lording over short people might be spent pondering the intrinsic beauty of a clean nostril, which they might never experience. So you can take a moment and rejoice, even in shortness. There's a positive side to everything.

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